Music festivals should be about one thing: the music. Unfortunately, some people have other agendas—I’m looking at you here, gentlemen. Many guys see music festivals as just another way to pick up chicks, score some ladies, holler at honeys, etc. As girls, we can get any dude, any day of the year, so why would we waste a once-a-year event like ACL Fest chasing some guy who probably hasn’t showered in a few days and who we may never see again?
So ladies, since guys don’t exactly share that viewpoint, here’s how you can ditch those dudes and get the most out of your festival experience.
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1. Travel in a pack. Guys are like animals of prey. It’s much easier for them to swoop in and start their attack if they can spot a lone lady. But if you surround yourself with a group of girls and even a few trusty guy friends, very few dudes would have the balls to approach you with some lame line.
2. Drink without a guilty conscience. If this guy really wants to impress you, he’s going to go for the number-one male maneuver: buying you drinks. For whatever reason, some guys think they have it in the bag if we accept a free drink from them. But did you sign an agreement trading free drinks for sex or even a phone number? No, so as long as you didn’t ask for that drink or try to trick him into it, a free drink comes with no strings attached. Just don’t be a free drink whore.
3. Call him out on his bullshit. On an average Friday, a guy might tell a little white lie to impress you. But this isn’t an average night; this is ACL. Guys see it as a weekend where they have nothing to lose, so they amp it up and could be anything from a musician’s family member to the lead singer of some band you’ve never heard of. But you’re a smart girl and can use your common sense to figure out that the guitarist of Alabama Shakes would probably be wearing an artist wristband. So let him know you’re not buying his shit.
4. Argue with him that Kimbra should have headlined, not Red Hot Chili Peppers. “I just feel Scar Tissue is, like, so overrated.” All respect, gone. Unless this guy is an 11 on the desperate scale, he’s going to be out of there in under a minute.
5. Don’t be afraid to use the B-word. If there’s one thing a guy on the prowl is scared of, it’s the B-word: boyfriend. Even if you’re a single lady, casually mentioning your boyfriend is a bigger turn off than saying you live with your parents. If he suggests going to some after-party at a friend of a friend’s house on the east side, instead of saying, “No, that’s sketchy, and I value my safety more than that,” simply say, “Yeah that sounds awesome! Let me just invite my boyfriend real quick. That totally sounds like his scene.” Works every time.
For guys wanting to get a girl at ACL, click here.